Humor Of The Day: Actual Announcements (Misprints) From Church "Bulletins"

Actual Announcements (Misprints) From Church "Bulletins":

The 1991 Spring Council retreat will be hell May 10 & 11

The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

The associate minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Now Up Yours."

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Irving Beltson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.

A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in honor of his wife.

The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.

Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use back door.

Ushers will eat latecomers.

Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.